Human to Human

For the Sake of Strangers is the title of a poem by Dorianne Laux. I read it this morning. Laux is American. Her poem appeals to me as call to both appreciate the world as it is, in its patterns and obligations. And to step from its edge. Perhaps we all do this many times in our lives. Be in the simple. Step off the edge. Return to the simple. Step from the edge to the unknowns. Half the time wishing to eject from the absurdity and limit that is human life. Half of the time drunk in the beauty of the most simple forms of being, seeing, doing.

My current life calls for a step from the edge. To be in the weightless fall, as Laux puts it. It has much to do with consciousness. Much to do with restoring center. Finding places of collaboration. It is all there. Journey of self. Journey with others.

My step from the edge is in my learning these days is about being together. In self. In groups. With my partner Teresa. What does being together mean? What is the deep entanglement? What is the webbed consciousness that offers such promise? What is the quiet presence of nothing together. I know these. Funny to think that, as it is with deep knowing, these questions visit in their repeated seasons, returning again for a cup of tea, or even a prolonged stay.

Remove fusion. Restore choice. Reclaim big story. These are focal points for me.

Sip of tea. Watch for the default of fusion. The impulse as my friend Roq calls it. Attractive. Yes. But it isn’t the giving up of self that creates together. Some needed pause in that one.

Sip of tea. Restoring choice. Oh, yes. This is a big one. Live life because it is chosen. It is a luxury at so many levels. Perhaps. But the expression of life as commitment freely offered rather that obligation begrudgingly obeyed — that is important.

Sip of tea. Reclaim story. The big one. The one that folds in the time and the timeless. The one that has purpose in the now and in the past / future continuum.

For the Sake of Strangers

No matter what the grief, its weight,
we are obliged to carry it.
We rise and gather momentum, the dull strength
that pushes us through crowds.
And then the young boy gives me directions
so avidly. A woman holds the glass door open,
waits patiently for my empty body to pass through.
All day it continues, each kindness
reaching toward another — a stranger
singing to no one as I pass on the path, trees
offering their blossoms, a retarded child
who lifts his almond eyes and smiles.
Somehow they always find me,seem even
to be waiting, determined to keep me
from myself, from the thing that calls to me
as it must have once called to them —
this temptation to step off the edge
and fall weightless, away from the world.

I have not been writing as much lately in this blog. I know it. Today I felt like saying something about it. The last month I just stopped. Changed routines. Wandered further from some of my habits of needing to tuck all things in neatly. Given myself permission to just be. Quietly that is. I haven’t been on retreat. I haven’t adopted particularly new practices or meditations. I haven’t been to a particular workshop. I journal, as I have for years. Yet, my entries there have been short also. To the point it feels.

 

I’ve been burning a lot of candles lately. Candles that burn through the day. And often I leave them through the night. I don’t know why. I’ve somehow wanted fire. Not tea lights. Long burn candles. A flame to come too. A center where my thoughts and stories can sit. Stare into the middle. Even if I’m not there. Without words. The long burn.

 

I don’t know when I’ll return to more writing. I almost don’t want to know. Perhaps when I can remove the “almost” it will be time. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe next month. Maybe after a sufficient experiment with attention to the churnings in other ways.

 

My partner Teresa just sent me a poem this morning that has some of this energy. Beautiful.

 

She Let Go’ a Poem by Rev. Safire Rose

She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go.

She let go of the fear. She let go of the judgments. She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.

She didn’t ask anyone for advice. She didn’t read a book on how to let go. She didn’t search the scriptures. She just let go. She let go of all of the memories that held her back. She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward. She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do it just right.

She didn’t promise to let go. She didn’t journal about it. She didn’t write the projected date in her Day-Timer. She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper. She didn’t check the weather report or read her daily horoscope. She just let go.

She didn’t analyze whether she should let go. She didn’t call her friends to discuss the matter. She didn’t do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment. She didn’t call the prayer line. She didn’t utter one word. She just let go.

No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or congratulations. No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing. Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.

There was no effort. There was no struggle. It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad. It was what it was, and it is just that.

In the space of letting go, she let it all be. A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.

Appreciating this simplicity from my friends Toke Moeller and Chris Corrigan, good questions that will help you prepare a meeting in a good way.

Purpose

What is the big purpose that we are trying to fulfill?

Harvest

What do you want to harvest?
– in our hands (tangible)?
– in our hearts (intangible)?

Invitation – the most important part of the meeting. “If it about us don’t do it without us.”

What is the inspiring question that will bring people together?
How will we invite people so the know they are needed?

Meeting

What will you do to make the meeting more creative and powerful?

Wise action

How will we make action happen?
– who will help us tune in to the reality of the situation?
– how will people learn together?

I met Thea two months ago at a BALLE Art of Hosting that I was co-leading. Below is what she sent in an email as followup. Inspiring.

We just finished the Biodynamic Conference in Madison and I’m happy to report it was an enormous success. We had over 600 participants and the energy was just buzzing the whole time. After our retreat in September I brought many of the ideas we discussed to the conference planning team, and we were able to incorporate a number of them. I am so grateful to have had those 3 days with all of you and to be able to bring some of the tools and insights we experienced together to the community I work with.

We started on Wednesday with a pre-conference gathering of mentor farmers in our farmer training program — about 30 came from across the US and Canada. I incorporated collective story harvest in the morning, with 5 mentors telling a story of a challenge they encountered working with an apprentice, and how they overcame it. The roles I chose for the listeners were witness, narrative arc, pivotal moments and questions. We had a great harvest after the groups with the same role got to share with each other, and several people came up to me afterwards to say how much they enjoyed it.

We also had small group conversations in the afternoon, focused on the question, “How can we support each other as mentor farmers?” — we had only one round and no tables so it wasn’t really a full world cafe, but still generated some great conversations and a good harvest of possibilities I can help support as we develop the program.

On Thursday I hosted a half-day gathering with about 30 apprentices in our farmer training program. We began with them introducing themselves to each other in pairs, and then introducing the other to the full group. It started the day with a good deal of laughter and a spirit of fun. We then did a world cafe, with two rounds on the question “What is the future asking from us?” and a third round on “What support do we need to do the work we are called to do?” This, too, went over quite well. People enjoyed themselves and seemed to make good connections.

The main conference was Friday-Sunday. I moderated the opening keynote panel on Friday morning, and after four farmers shared about their farms and connection to the sacred element of agriculture, I asked everyone in the audience to turn to someone they didn’t know and ask them “What inspired you from this morning?” as we moved into our 30 minute break. Before the other two keynote addresses on Friday evening and Saturday morning, I offered another conversation topic for a 3 minute conversation with a new person, developed in collaboration with the keynote speaker to help bring people into the mood of what the speaker would be talking about. It was great to have the role of conversation starter throughout the conference, although of course I also had to be the one to cut people off after 3 minutes when they clearly would have loved to talk for much longer.

Before I participated in the Art of Hosting retreat we had already planned to include Open Space on Friday and Saturday afternoons, but after experiencing it with all of you, I was better able to collaborate with the person we brought in to organize it. He made space for about 40 conversations among the 600 people, but I think we had more like 10-15 going on at once — we had a film screening going on concurrently and I think a lot of people were ready to just stare at the lake by 4pm. But those who found their way to conversations seemed to find them very meaningful.

As part of our closing on Sunday, my role was to invite people to form groups of 3 and talk about insights, reflections and burning questions from the conference, this time with 20 minutes to have more of a full conversation. Then I invited people to share with the whole group. There was such a richness in the comments that came forward and I am sure having the opportunity to talk in the small group beforehand contributed to that.

We concluded the conference with a closing ceremony on the conference center’s indoor terrace overlooking Lake Monona. There were several powerful moments but what brought so many of us to tears was everyone singing “Halleluiah” in 4 part harmony together. It is just incredible to be in the midst of 300 ordinary people singing together, the deep bass of so many men’s voices we rarely hear in that way, to be adding a small voice to that immense collective of beautiful sound.

Open-heartedness seemed to be a theme of the conference, and so often throughout the 5 days I felt my heart. People were just so happy to be there, to connect. I know some of that would have happened without all the hosting we incorporated, but I also feel that they were an important contribution toward facilitating those connections and bringing the spirit of the event to the incredible place it reached.

I deeply appreciate the contribution each of you made toward this coming into being, and hope to continue the dialogue.

Warmly,
Thea

Thea Maria Carlson
Education Program Coordinator
Biodynamic Farming and Gardening Association