This title comes from a blog post that I read this morning. Tuesday Ryan Hart, a friend and colleague is the person who wrote it. There is an honesty in it that I appreciate as she describes an experience with another friend and colleague, Tim Merry.
What’s honest for me is that I too hunger for a resolution. For good reasons. And for convenient reasons.
I love it that Tuesday is committed to keeping the dialogue open and on-going. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t experiments and a “todo” list. It does mean that the fundamental need is to stay in relationship, which doesn’t end.
Here are more of her words from the post. It’s worth reading the whole of it too.
- We have resolution, but it isn’t real, or it is superficial. It might address the current circumstance but it doesn’t give us any capacity to deal with future occurrences.
- Forcing resolution can lead to short-term alleviation of feelings and discomfort but may have no real meaningful impact beyond making us feel better in the moment.
- Our relationships are not rooted in reality as we move from our lived experiences of each other to a set of “should” or “shouldn’ts”.
- Our relationships become more vulnerable to future disruption. We aren’t able to build the resilience – we don’t get the practice necessary – to face future challenges.
- As process facilitators we undermine the work of the group because we don’t allow the discomfort or learning that comes from it.