Human to Human

It’s early morning. Thursday. In Utah’s San Rafael Swell. Which is to say, beautiful and rugged slot canyons. And desert. And dust. And wind that flapped our tents quite vigorously in the night. But is now calm. Ah, sunrise and morning calm.

Eleven of us men have started our Unplugged Adventure. Guided by Marshall and Lucas — they are good, rugged, kind, learning-filled men. We’ve had our opening circle around a fire the night before. Each of us has burned something, an offering. Something we each wish to release. Or claim. Mine was a paper bag with close to a hundred names in it, and circumstances, and memories — I’m trying to learn about slow & steady and these people and memories have connection to that.

I’m up early, wandering a bit outside of our camp. I love the early morning light and it’s quiet. I take to balancing a few stones (shout out to my buddy Chris). I love the art of it. I love the fine-tuning of it. Sometimes it doesn’t work — you move on to the next. I love the micro changes that can render these gravity-persuading moments.

We try to balance things, don’t we. Sometimes in our inners. Sometimes in our outers. We try to make beauty. We try to orient ourselves to both commitment and to letting go. There is medicine in this, isn’t there. None of these balanced stones are permanent. They too will be moved. By the wind. By the slight rumbles of earth. By the sandstone that evolves outside of time — two or three grains here and there.

There is much to learn. There is much to celebrate. There is much to rewire in us (or unwire). I can feel all of it happening. Stones are teaching me. Kind men are teaching me. The wind is teaching me.

I’m a lucky man in big learning, and big beauty.

Such good hosting yesterday in Becoming & Belonging. Thx Jenny Spector, who “shared one”, who brought and hosted such rich sharing on the topic of Care.

I told Jenny after that I’d appreciated her expertise.

1. Pick a topic that has importance to people. In her case, “care.”
2. Invite people to tell stories about when they have experienced that topic. In so doing, we activate the topic. We source it in ourselves.
3. Return to Circle to witness what has been shared and learned.

Jenny’s twist yesterday that brought added tenderness and intimacy was by have partner listening, and then have the partners reflect the story they heard.

What delight.

There are many ways to continue such learning and sharing. Becoming & Belonging is a series I created to experience and grow such care together. And to get to the heart of things.

See the many offerings here. You can pick and choose what feels compelling.

Tomorrow I begin another Men’s Retreat. It’s in the San Rafael Swell, through terrain like what is in the above photo. It’s a four day trip, hosted by the brilliant Lucas and Marshall of Unplugged — I love the way they encourage and host rewilding. Camping. Long hikes. Circle. Stories. Campfires. Questions that matter. It’s men seeking meaning and purpose together. It’s land that teaches, tests, invites, appreciates. As land so often does.

Themes and intentions often arise for me when a gathering is closer. This morning, that theme feels near and clarifying. “Slow & Steady.” That’s the one I’ll carry with me in 8 mile hikes and climbs. Slow & Steady is a physical requirement for me, among much younger men. I hold no illusions about that. My body is more suited these days for Slow & Steady. Tortoise, not Hare.

But here’s the thing that I notice this morning. This theme isn’t just for this men’s retreat and for these demanding hikes in these learning-filled days. This theme, Slow & Steady, has been beckoning to me for quite some time, over the last few years in particular. My default fulfillments of speed and efficiency, that have served me very well in my life, haven’t felt, well…, as fulfilling. It’s as though my psyche, not just my body, has been hungering for its new mode. Slow & Steady. Which is to say, clear. And purposeful. And with less fret. And with more kindness. And with more integration. And with more celebration.

And, and, and.

Slow & Steady. I’m grateful for the clarity. I’m grateful for other men leading. And inviting what is real in these days to come.

Oh, have I loved hosting this week, Dreams & Seams. A new workshop. Thank you to those who participated.

At the high level, Dreams & Seams is another Becoming & Belonging offering. Online. Encourages curiosity, authenticity. Encourages further relationship with life flowing. Celebrates intuition, learning, surrender.

At a layer down from that, the process is using dreams (the night-time kind) to invite awareness. Not dream analysis. Yes, dream associativeness. That applies to waking life.

Dreams — because we have them (or we want them again). Because dreams have invitations. Because dreams are expressed through the sub-conscious, and perhaps the super-conscious world (sometimes we dream for the community).

Seams — because sometimes we need some stitching together of our life experiences. Sometimes for repair. Sometimes for fortitude and strength. Sometimes to further breathe hope to our inspirations.

Belonging is one of the most central invitations I know, and that I give my heart to. Becoming with more life energy — that too.

I offer simple structure to guide such things. And to participate. Jump in.