Slow Down — An Imperative For Speeding Up

An early important teaching for me — behaviorally and conceptually — was that of slowing down.

My friend Meg Wheatley was one of the people to share that with me. It was often in the context of working with groups of people. It was emphasizing the necessity of relationality. That meant Circle, so that we could listen more deeply. That meant Cafe Tables, so that we could turn to one another in themed ways. Sometimes it was spoken, “slow down to speed up,” again lifting the significance of going together.

Meg is the first to teach me the African proverb, “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go further, go together.” It says much about contradicting contemporary narratives and noble stories that only emphasize speed. Going slow is another way to go fast. Going slow is another way to bring meaning and purpose, which then helps the other things happen with less struggle.

My friend Chris Corrigan is another person that helped me to appreciate slowness. This was often in the context of hosting Art of Hosting events. A more spacious lunch — 90 minutes or two hours, not 45 minutes. More spacious time in small groups — 30 – 45 minutes, not 12 minutes.

With Chris and all of those events, we were all learning about the power of connection. And how connection isn’t just accomplished, it’s experienced. It’s evolved. Connection comes from both joy and struggle together — but definitely is accelerated by willingness to commit to slowness together.

Recently I’ve found myself returning to “morning practices” with more deliberateness. This is a phrase that I learned through Art of Hosting. It’s the stuff that often happens before the planned sessions. Meditations. Walks. Yoga. Breath. For me, I typically have a better day when I’ve made space for slowness:

  • Meditation (15-20 minutes); This is the one that most teaches me about going slow. I set a timer so that I don’t have to look at the clock. I sit in a chair. Sometimes eyes closed. Sometimes open. My mind will wander. Sometimes wonder if I forgot to set the timer because time feels expanded. This is the best signal of benefit. It’s only 15 minutes. And yet, perceptually, it feels like more. What an important interrupter of all that speed.

Living with rush, all of the time, is painful. And wierdly addicting. Sometimes, I like the adrenaline hit of it all. But it is a punishing disposition, I find, to feel always behind and always rushed. There’s more joy to reclaim in the slowing down, and, in the slowing down that ironically creates speeding up with more clarity.

Thx for reading. And perhaps experimenting with some slow.

4 Replies to “Slow Down — An Imperative For Speeding Up”

  1. Move at the pace of guidance… doing my best to not outrun my breath… keeping my eyes open to details and tiny gifts… reading the daily blessings of my friend. You.

  2. What a lovely post — I love the idea of inviting pause and slow time into our lives. This morning, I took a mini pause on my garden bench, watching the colourful autumn dance of nature and listening to the birds sing. It felt wonderful to make space for nothing to happen, just to be, discover, and enjoy.

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Gifts of Circle - Question Cardsasd
Gifts of Circle is 30 short essays divided into 4 sections: 1) Circle's Bigger Purpose, 2) Circle's Practice, 3) Circle's First Requirements, and 4) Circle's Possibility for Men. From the Introduction: "Circle is what I turn to in the most comprehensive stories I know -- the stories of human beings trying to be kind and aware together, trying to make a difference in varied causes for which we need to go well together. Circle is also what I turn to in the most immediate needs that live right in front of me and in front of most of us -- sharing dreams and difficulties, exploring conflicts and coherences. Circle is what I turn to. Circle is what turns us to each other."

Question Cards is an accompanying tool to Gifts of Circle. Each card (34) offers a quote from the corresponding chapter in the book, followed by sample questions to grow your Circle hosting skills and to create connection, courage, and compassionate action among groups you host in Circle.

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In My Nature
is a collection of 10 poems. From A Note of Beginning: "This collection of poems arises from the many conversations I've been having about nature. Nature as guide. Nature as wild. Nature as organized. I remain a human being that so appreciates a curious nature in people. That so appreciates questions that pick fruit from inner being, that gather insights and intuitions to a basket, and then brings the to table to be enjoyed and shared over the next week."

This set of Note Cards (8 cards + envelopes)  quotes a few favorite passages from poems in In My Nature. I offer them as inspiration. And leave room for you to write personal notes.

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This set of Note Cards (8 cards + envelopes)  quotes a few favorite passages from poems in Most Mornings. I offer them as inspiration. And leave room for you to write personal notes.

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