Category: General Learning

” Let me fall if I must fall.
The one I am becoming will catch me.”
-Baal Shem Tov, Jewish Mystic, 1700s.

This from yesterday’s Wander School, offered as followup from a participant (thank you Elif).

Because falling is part of it.
Because change and becoming is part of it.
Because trusting is part of it.
Because mystery is part of it.
Because sweetness is part of it too.

On we go.

A friend recommended Rick Hanson recently (thx Marshall). Hanson is a clinical psychologist, and author of the book, Hardwiring Happiness.

Hansen offers this helpful reality (I recognize it in me and others):

Let’s conduct an experiment: Take a moment to think back over your day; which experiences stand out for you?

For most of us, it’s the negative ones. 

Enjoyable, useful experiences—like smiling at a friend, or finishing a task—typically happen many times a day, but they usually wash through the brain like water through a sieve, barely leaving a trace.

Meanwhile, our stressful, often harmful experiences—like getting stuck in traffic, or feeling misunderstood by a partner—routinely produce lasting changes in neural structure or function.

This is your brain’s negativity bias in action.

Positivity is a discipline and practice. This is what I keep learning. Of course there were challenging things in the day — this isn’t about denying such. Of course there was injustice in the day. Again, not about looking away.

Positivity is about looking toward what already exists. Be it the small stuff (I like petting my neighbor’s dog for a few minutes), or the big stuff (a peace accord was signed).

The positivity practice is a deliberate focus on the all of things, including the positive. And making space for that in the brain, in the belly, in the heart. It’s about insisting holism. Or wellism, which is the topic of an upcoming B & B session that brings my friend Marlyn Diaz into the conversation.

Gives me a few ideas for a new exercise I want to try when hosting Pastors later this week. Fun. Here we go.

This week is a good design week for me.

Thursday, flights willing, I’ll find my way to Phoenix. And there, I’ll team up with my friend and colleague Travis, to host 15 pastors in five days of learning about Relational Leadership. The program is NGLI (Next Generation Leadership Initiative).

Exciting. I love the way the basic title points to something simple, yet important — we lead in relationship with others. The subtitle is also important — “Building Heart and Skill in Team-Building and Community Engagement.” I love the way it points to skill and heart, and in a few domains that pastors know is at the core of so much. So, here we go.

When I’m designing programs — that is, creating agenda — I rely on a couple of things.

One is the schedule. Travis and I are now hosting in our third year together. We have stuff we did last year and the year before. It’s good to pull up that document and remember a few important things to include.

Two, I also rely on design elements to show up spontaneously. There’s spontaneously in the moment, but here I’m naming what happens the week before. Ah, an impression to do an exercise on how inner meets outer. Ah, an intuition to ask a question on joy, and another on challenge.

It matters that designs and agendas have coherence. It also matters that they have real-time adaptiveness together.

I love feeling the fixed stuff. I love feeling the flow stuff. Both matter. Both are at the heart of my 30 ish years of facilitating groups in leadership and learning.

So, here we go. What an alive moment and opportunity to be with smart and caring people, getting on with the work they care about getting on with. A good design week.

Yesterday’s Becoming & Belonging session was a particular delight. Thx to those who were there live.

We used story. Yes, the stories that we each brought. That’s always true. There’s an overarching invitation to integrate.

Yes also, we used a story of long ago, a tale, from the time before time. It was of three sisters finding their knowing in the “River of Knowing” and then returning to their village.

There are particular words for this B & B format that I loved highlighting with the group yesterday:

• I, and I suspect you, need lanes of learning that are not restricted to the linear.
• Lanes that dwell outside of the planned and that lift a simple structure for “aha.”
• We welcome company that unapologetically explores nuance of the mysterious.
• We find the simple and meaningful in the complex and sometimes murky.

And then there was the telling of the story. In two parts, each about 5 minutes in length. It’s a time to be moved my story, and or course, by how our respective interiors connect with the outer material that is the story.

Some real gems of insight and intuition offered:

• “I am here for remembering. And helping others to remember too.”
• “Mini pauses…linger longers…try the simple.”
• “The ‘River of Knowing’ isn’t a pond. It is a river, flowing. We never step in the same river twice.”

A bow to those that participated.
What joy to be moved together.

Jump in as inspired. Small group sessions are most often 90 minutes. There are several ways to begin. And several ways to linger.