Ashes, Descent, Rich Life

When I wrote A Cadence of Despair (CentreSpoke 2020), I wrote of ashes. I didn’t use that language then. I used the language of descent. And through sharing highly personal material, I mapped some of the relationship that I knew with despair — pain, grief, shame, and loss that, with some luck, some friendship, and some process, could find it’s way to hints, insights, and intimacy with self and others. However, the mapping of despair isn’t linear. For some of us, it loops back and regresses. In my life this included relationship with suicide and desires to let go. I’m grateful that in the mapping I know, this journey evolved again to the inherently simple, to birth, and to new life.

I’m reading lately from Robert Bly’s Iron John. I’m appreciating his orientation to “ashes,” to descent. To the need to break gravitational pull of patterned superficial. “The word ashes contains in it a dark feeling for death; ashes when put on the face whiten it as death does….for us, how can we get a look at the cinders side of things when the society is determined to create a world of shopping malls and entertainment complexes in which we are made to believe that there is no death, disfigurement, illness, insanity, poverty, lethargy, or misery.”

The other day, a friend asked me of despair. Asking for a bit of guidance. I was glad to offer what I could, which in short was, encouragement to not forever avoid the descent, nor the ashes. The timing of entry can vary. I suppose the depth too. But the descent and the ashes have medicine to offer. We can seek “perfect” lives. But perfect lives don’t initiate us to grown and matured wise humans. Hmm…. 

All of that, I suppose to say, I’m intrigued by the sense-making that people do in the ashes and in the descent. I’m also intrigued by the sense-making that people do in the sun shining and in the ascent. I’m interested in the metabolizing of life lived. I’m interested in the life-styles that remain open to such potent individual and shared experiences. Hmm….

2 Replies to “Ashes, Descent, Rich Life”

  1. Hmm …

    Interesting timing of your post. One of the things I am learning these days is about staying in the moment of the emotion … fear, shame, self-doubt … without side-stepping or skirting the realness of that moment. But stepping back from the story behind the emotion to just notice that it exists, that I am no longer “in” that story, and I am okay. I am neither bad nor good, neither in despair nor in hope. I am with whatever parts of me are showing up, and I am compassionate toward all of who I am.

    I carried the ashes, the descent, with me for a long time as a penance for who I was not. I suppose the medicine for me now is that I persisted in the pursuit of who I am now and who I am becoming. There is not a story for me in which the ashes no longer exist. But the story of me-today is able to carry the ashes with tenderness and compassion for the spirit of me-then. And to trust the wholeness of me-becoming.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Gifts of Circle - Question Cardsasd
Gifts of Circle is 30 short essays divided into 4 sections: 1) Circle's Bigger Purpose, 2) Circle's Practice, 3) Circle's First Requirements, and 4) Circle's Possibility for Men. From the Introduction: "Circle is what I turn to in the most comprehensive stories I know -- the stories of human beings trying to be kind and aware together, trying to make a difference in varied causes for which we need to go well together. Circle is also what I turn to in the most immediate needs that live right in front of me and in front of most of us -- sharing dreams and difficulties, exploring conflicts and coherences. Circle is what I turn to. Circle is what turns us to each other."

Question Cards is an accompanying tool to Gifts of Circle. Each card (34) offers a quote from the corresponding chapter in the book, followed by sample questions to grow your Circle hosting skills and to create connection, courage, and compassionate action among groups you host in Circle.

This will close in 60 seconds

asd
In My Nature
is a collection of 10 poems. From A Note of Beginning: "This collection of poems arises from the many conversations I've been having about nature. Nature as guide. Nature as wild. Nature as organized. I remain a human being that so appreciates a curious nature in people. That so appreciates questions that pick fruit from inner being, that gather insights and intuitions to a basket, and then brings the to table to be enjoyed and shared over the next week."

This set of Note Cards (8 cards + envelopes)  quotes a few favorite passages from poems in In My Nature. I offer them as inspiration. And leave room for you to write personal notes.

This will close in 60 seconds

asd
Most Mornings is a collection of 37 poems. I loved writing them. From the introduction: "This collection of poems comes from some of my sense-making that so often happens in the morning, nurtured by overnight sleep. The poems sample practices. They sample learnings. They sample insights and discoveries. They sample dilemmas and concerns."

This set of Note Cards (8 cards + envelopes)  quotes a few favorite passages from poems in Most Mornings. I offer them as inspiration. And leave room for you to write personal notes.

This will close in 60 seconds